Monday, July 30, 2012

Its My BiRtHdAY!! Guess that makes it Offical, I survived the year from Hell..

                                                                         To Me

A big Howdy everyone...!!
I've always been one who loves celebrating her Birthday...I've always looked at my Birthday as a day to Celebrate making it another year...dealing with all the ups and downs of the year..learning something new everyday and applying it to my life! So celebrate I have done..even with all the ups and downs I've had a great life with very few regrets!
This year as I celebrated my birthday.. I found myself celebratng much more then just my Birthday..I was celebrating the survival of the year from hell..
I've had to climb a million mountians in my life...many that I wasn't sure I'd make it to the top and back down again..of course I always made it despite the struggles.....I'm a fighter!!
Last night I met my friends at the Dock to celebrate my Birthday just like I've done for the past 10 years. Even my long time Girlfriend came in from California to celebrate with me...but something was different, missing, a feeling of uncertianty lingered in the celebrating!
Funny how one finds themselves smack dab in the middle of change...I'm so thankful that I can finally see some light at the end of the tunnel...I'm Thankful that I am feeling more and more like my old self, I'm so thankful for all the friends here that were there when I needed you most, helping me threw the hard times in the past year. Thankful for the Doctors who finally figured out what was wrong with me & started putting my life back together..

The one thought that hangs on in the back of my mind is do I have the strength in myself to fight all the side affects left behind that still need to be fixed before I can truly be myself again..

As we all sat talking about Birthday celebrations past and the fun times we all shared over the years and lifted our glasses to toast my birthday last night I realized that I won't really ever be the person I was...I've changed not by choice but none the less I have changed..

I've moved on to a new Season in my life, a season that won't include some of the things I love most, but one that will offer many new things I may come to love, I will grieve the losses and celebrate the gains.
Its hard to move on sometimes, even scary at times and yet it's exciting too..!

I know I'm not alone there are so many others who are starting a new season of there life..struggling just as I've done trying hard not to let go of the things that made all those past celebrations such great memories..
I don't know what the future holds for me but I look forward to finding out... I pray that there are more and more positives in the year to come...& come next year I can tell everyone that I love Celebrating my Birthday!

God Bless you all! Until we meet again may your day be filled with sunshine and happy moments!

Hugs
Tonya



Friday, July 20, 2012

No Catchy Title Just come on in! Lots to share with ya!

A Big Howdy to all... I sure hope that you are all geared up for another summer weekend! Loved this sign had to share it with you! I've decided I'm using it this weekend.. I'm on the Island this weekend and plan to totally enjoy my weekend with all my boater Friends.. this is the biggest weekend of the season on Kelley's island. Its called Islandfest Weekend! There will be lots of Craft Vendors, Food Vendors, a Carnival for the kids, a street dance and finally fireworks Saturday night. I used to pack up a huge truck load of my Creations & set up a booth every year at Islandfest but it got to be to much work so now I just enjoy all the other crafters goods..
I wasn't sure if I was going to make it up here this weekend since my Van decided to breakdown on me. Finally got it back on Tuesday...but once again I wasn't happy with the shop that fixed it for me because the air Conditioner still isn't working properly.
The Air coming out of the vents is only cooled down to 60-65 degrees which isn't cool enough to cool the whole van down. So its generally 80 to 85 degrees which isn't cool at all in this triple digit temps we've been having lately.
But thank goodness it doesn't appear that there is any damage to the engine due to its over heating.. So I packed it and off we went to the Island to hang out with friends all weekend!!
Figure I'll deal with the repair shop next week..

I spent a lot of time in the Pool with my nieces this week. I used to be on the swim team so I was showing them all of the smim moves we used to do... It was so hot that was about the only place to find any relief and we had a great time together...Even Baby Eathen loves the pool and we took him in everyday too..

All of my nephews & there wives are expecting along with one Niece who is expecting. So we have 4 baby's in the warmer so Peggy is planning Baby showers. the first shower is Saturday for Jessie & jason. they are having a little girl. So we spent time getting the house & yard all cleaned up and ready for the baby shower.

Had another freak tragedy with my teeth this week. I was feeling the back of my teeth with my tounge and all of a sudden another one of my teeth fell out. Another front tooth right next to the one I yanked out with the duct tape. So another rush to the dentist office onl to find that it is not worth trying to repair. What was left just crumbled into pieces when he touched it with his tools. So I look like a total dork with one rebilt tooth in front that looks like a wood Tooth says my niece Hailey..and a big gap right next to it.
that makes 3 teeth that have crumbled right out of my mouth in the past 2 months.. Soon they are all going to crumble away...

I had my appointment with Dr. Awan on Tuesday to discuss the results of nerve damage test they ran on my hands last week. I now know exactly what is wrong with my hands and how bad the damage is as well as what can be done to fix my hands up good as new... Now of course we all know they will never be good as new but they should be close if all goes well with the surgeries that need to be done. Best part is that they are all going to be Microscopic surgery with small incisions & few stitches. No cast only bandaids.

Carpal tunnel syndrome: A type of compression neuropathy (nerve damage) caused by compression and irritation of the median nerve in the wrist.

I have it in both wrist. Oddly it is worse in the left wrist then the right. But I have the most pain in the right hand. Mine is now in the advanced stage which requires surgery to repair & to stop any further damage to the nerve. It was determined that it advanced once my thyroid disease worsened. I can no longer feel much in my fingers other then the constant thumping/throbbing pain 24 hrs a day.

Dupuytren’s contracture. 

Dupuytren’s disease is an abnormal thickening of the tissue just beneath the skin known as fascia. This thickening occurs in the palm and can extend into the fingers. Firm cords and lumps may develop that can cause the fingers to bend into the palm, in which case it is described as Dupuytren’s contracture.  Occasionally, the disease will cause thickening on top of the finger knuckles (knuckle pads),
Mine has affected the two middle fingers in both hands. On the right hand I have the Knuckle pads.

Trigger finger and thumb are painful conditions that cause the fingers or thumb to catch or lock in a bent position. The problems often stem from inflammation of tendons that are located within a protective covering called the tendon sheath.
Mine has affected the right hand 1st finger. It's locked in the extended position always pointing. It's the worst of the thumping/throbbing 24/7.
Not to mention it gets in the way of everything so it gets bumped constantly. It also makes it really difficult to pick anything up. You think you have a hold of it but then realize you don't. then add the other thing to it & you simply can't hold onto anything.


Cubital tunnel syndrome is a condition brought on by increased pressure on the ulnar nerve at the elbow. There is a bump of bone on the inner portion of the elbow (medial epicondyle) under which the ulnar nerve passes. This site is commonly called the “funny bone”.  At this site, the ulnar nerve lies directly next to the bone and is susceptible to pressure. When the pressure on the nerve becomes great enough to disturb the way the nerve works, then numbness, tingling, and pain may be felt in the elbow, forearm, hand, and/or fingers.
Mine has affected the left elbow which is why the left hand is actually the worst of the two because it adds to the numbness.

So with answers to all my questions Dr Awan looks at me and says...So when do you want to schedule the surgeries..the sooner we get these things fixed the sooner you can get the use of your hands back...and less chance of any further damage to the nerves.. How about two weeks.. I was like wooooooooooo... I want to enjoy the rest of summer the best I can..no cast for me in this heat...He chuckled  & told me I wouldn't have any cast just tiny incisions and bandaids. I was like you're kidding right... he says, No..all microscopic & I will have you using your hands doing exersises on the third day, with full use within 6 weeks.   
I was so excited but reality is it probably won't be that easy...but If it is this will be one happy lady..
So I said, ok lets start with the left hand first so I know what to expect by the timeyou get to the right hand which has more issues then the left.
He scheduled my 1st surgery for August 22nd. Then if all goes well I will probably have my right hand done the end of September. That will give me a month or two to heal up before winter sets in and I start creating full time again..

It was a busy week...& I'm all tuckered out especially after the long drive north to the Island. So gona rest up tonight so I ccan spend the day hanging with my friends on the dock tomorrow. 

I hope you all are enjoying your summer..staying cool and safe!

Until next time remember you are always a thought away...

Blessings
Tonya 






Saturday, July 14, 2012

Oh the Blessed Month of July~Sunflowers~Tomatoes~Heat~Birthday~Broken Van & Doctors appointments!



Happy July everyone.... My sunflowers are back in full Bloom & as you know I love my Sunflower Smiles!
I've even found a few new Sunflower goodies at GW..& just this past Monday my SIL gave me the most darling hanging flat bucket filled with Sunflowers... She said she seen it at GW and had to pick it up for me. I love it and plan to hang it on my Trailer Door..I'll take a pic to share with you after I hang it today..

As many of you know we have had record breaking temps here in Ohio this July along with some severe Storms. This heat has been really hard on all the Farmers. I had to laugh the other day as I looked at our beautiful Flower bed Peg and I worked on for a month filled with so may beautiful blooms but not a blade of Green grass anywhere on our 5 acres...Its so brown you can't tell if its dirt or dead grass..
But for the first time in the 4 years I've been living in my trailer at my brothers there flowerbeds suffered great neglect! Then this year I helped Peg make her flowerbeds look as pretty as the ones I'd made around my Trailer.

Finally every flowerbed on the property looks fantastic but they almost look funny amid the dried out lawn.
They get watered every day and it has paid off because they are just filled with pretty Blooms..

The garden is doing fantastic too..Yep it gets watered daily too!
Peg picked her first Ripe Red Juicy Tomatoes...Since Jimmy does all the work in the Garden she made him a huge BLT... He said it was Yummy... soon we will all get to enjoy a yummy BLT & I can't wait...

My Herb Garden is doing fantastic as well.. I started picking some of the Herbs, bundling them and hanging them to dry!


The kids have been Swimming daily and I must admit every chance I get I jump in the pool to cool off.
My Bro & Nephew built a new deck yesterday beside the pool. It looks awesome!

Today I woke up to the sound of rain drops on my roof...what a blessed sound that was..It had cooled down last night so I opened my windows to let in some fresh air...It smelled so fresh this morning for the first time in months...Sadly it didn't last but an hour or so and it wasn't enough to make a difference in the dried out Grass..although so far it has stayed cool with little humidity so I still have my windows open to enjoy the fresh smell after the rain!

Every July my Birthday rolls around again! A time to reflect on all has has passed over the year count my blessings for the year! This year the list of not so good things in my life is much bigger then my Blessings list by far..but I'm trying to look forward to growing the Blessings list..as many of the negatives hopefully will lead to blessings as my health issues are resolved.

True to the month of July and my consistant life my Van is Broken down again. This is the 4th year in a row that the Van of the year has either The front of the Van litterly fell off the front of the Van 2019, Blown an Engine 2010, Gas Tank Sprung a leak 2011, Now July 2012 the air conditioner quit so replaced it last week but it wasn't working right. I took it back only to find the Fans froze up so the van is in the shop leaving me stranded once again in July waiting for the new Fan to come in so the Van doesn't over Heat & Blow another Engine. Unbelievable that every July my then van breaks down and leaves me stranded..

Before the van over heated I did make it to my latest doctors appointments on Thursday. I had the test run on my hands to verify one the general diagnoses made by Dr Awan and to verify how bad my hands are.
Good news/bad news however ya might look at it. I won't get the official report until next Tuesday when I see Dr Awan again.
But the neurologist pretty much varified what Dr Awan had diagnosed. It was strange tho. My right hand is the hand that is in pain all the time but the test show the left hand has more nerve damage/blockage then the right hand & my left elbow also has some nerve damage/blockage.I'm not sure if damage/blockage are the right words to use but I think you'll understand what I mean.
I do have Carpel Tunnel in both hands worse in left which further causes numbness.
I do have Dupuytrens Contracture in both hands which causes the numbness & pain.
I do have one locked Trigger finger. Contstant pain but numb very strange.
My thumb has a huge Calicum deposit in it that has spread my thumb joint apart and is in constant pain.

All of the above has left me with little use of both my hands. It is really difficult to do much of anything and typing is really hard. As I type this all my fingers are numb & tingling..so missing keys strokes and have to use spell check over and over...LOL..what a total pain in the butt!! As i mentioned tho most are fixable & God Willing once they are fixed and mended I will be find somepeace of heart and the ability to work in my shop doing everything I have always done or at least most...

Although I can't sand and paint right now I have been doing some creating gathering with the pieces that are already sanded & painted. Not much but enough to keep my mind busy.

Sorry this was so long but I guess I've been missing in action and found lots to catch up on..

I do miss everyone and love to hear from you all...

Have a great weekend filled with happy moments!

Summer Blessings from my house to yours!!

Tonya










































































Thursday, July 5, 2012

Happy Blated 4th of July! and some catching up!

I hope you all had a fantastic 4th Of July.... sorry I'm a day late but hey Celebrating Freedom is worth celebrating for two days..Smile
Actually my computer/internet decided not to get a signal until about an hour ago..been acting stupid all day long..No clue why...
Wow today was a sweltering hot here... then I was driving my digital temp read out said 107 degree's..that is just plain down right to hot for this lady..and of course I had all kinds of errands to run and places I needed to be or i would have hidden inside all day long. then along came a thunderstorm that lasted maybe 45 minutes and it was even worse with the humidity almost took your breath away to step outside. I didn't even go to the fireworks I watched them out my window...decided my cool house was the best place to be..
What's it been like where you are?

I've been staying up at the lake, Port Clinton & Kelley's Island, Ohio and we've  had some nasty storms on the mainland... thank heavens nothing damaged at my house just some downed tree timbs.. On the island the storms weren' nearly as severe m,ostly down pouring for hours and windy.

In Delaware, Ohio and surrounding areas the storms were much worse with many people still without electric.
Thank God my SIL said that most of the storm passed them and my trailer by where we live outside of Delaware but down the road it was pretty bad with downed trees and power lines..Boy when mother nature decides to throw a tantrum she really throws one...to much heat & to many damaging storms.
the heat didn't used to bother me until my thyroid started acting up and now days I simply can't take it.. I feel so badly for those who have no electric and no air conditioning...
I have  one little air conditioner in my house and 5 fans running and its still 87 degrees in the house at 2 in the morning...even my poor kitty's and Puddles are hot..

I am feeling better over all ...other then the heat of course...but I do think my thyroid levels are finally leveling out.. to the point I actually feel like a human again and not some depressed nut case...I do notice that if I don't take my calicum on time I feel weird but as soon as I take it I feel better.. Doc told me I had to remember that calicum because mine is low... & it affects the Thyroid levels.. Its been kinda hard for me to adjust to a time to take that stupid Thyroid pill because you can't eat for an hour before or after... I'm a breakfast eater like within 1/2 an hour of waking up..so finally decided to wake up take it and go back to bed so when I really wake up I can eat and take the rest of these confounded meds..which have to be taken with food or you get a bad tummy ache...ick.....I think I finally have my schedule in place...

Now to get these hands working again and I just might really feel like my old self or at least close to it..

Neck is nearly healed.... Imagine it has been 3 months & 1 week since my surgery and it is still healing.

Had a great weekend...Hung out with my friends on the Boat dock Friday evening, went to a Block party Saturday on the Island and got to see a lot of people I haven't seen yet this summer...Great food and lots of fun..
Hung out with my girlfriend Sunday night sitting on her porch swing having a glass of wine together...watching all the wild bunny's hopping all over her back yard..just chatting the evening away..I love that swing of hers reminds me of the one we had on our porch when I was growing up..

While running errands today Of course I had to stop by the GW and check for goodies. I hit the jack pot forsure. I bought a basically large 3' long x 22" tall x 24" wide New Tote filled with over 40 New Holiday Gift Bags, different sizes, 10 Gift boxes, 28 packages of every color of tissue paper you could think of, Gift Tags, Stickers, Bows, Ribbon, 20 little bags of diferent Confetti's, Cards, some Mini Star Garland for a mini tree and a container of large Star Garland.
All For the unbelievable price of $12.99 minus my Golden Buckeye card 10% discount. Every single thing in the tote was new never used... I couldn't beleive it.. I have enough gift bags & boxes to do all my Christmas gifts this year and birthdays too! Especially with the few I've picked up here and there at the thrift store this year...

Time for me to call it a day much to do tomorrow...

Have a wonderful week/weekend...Stay Cool!

Blessings from me to you all!
Tonya